Sitting here on my bed thinking about what to write about is harder than I expected. It's hard when you have something to say but yet dont know how to say it. I currently now have a new boyfriend... I have been talking with this guy for about a month now and we are finally dating now and I am happy about it but at the same time I dont know if I was really ready for all this. I dated a guy all summer long and I have had a thing with him since my freshman year. This past summer when we started dating, we were together almost everyday. We went so many places together and did so many fun things. But once summer was over and were about to start school again, he freaked out and we broke up. There wasnt ever really a closer period in all this and being with someone else makes me think I am over him but when I am just sitting here on my bed and I get a text from him, it makes me wonder what else could have been. I know that I shouldn't go back to him but it is soo hard to just sit here and wonder what the real reasons were. I hate being confused and that is all I am now.
...I don't know what to do.
I'm sorry you're feeling so confused here! But I like that you admit to not knowing what to write--presumably for this blog--and then admit that you really don't know what to say to "him". It's a nice paralell. And you do a good job spelling out the contradictions between what you know to be true (you shouldn't go back to him) and what you feel to be true (there's still potential in the relationship). It's a difficult path to tread, and you do a good job emphasizing how lost it makes us.
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